smells like what??? not teen spirit.
04:39, 2008-Mar-18
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We were at Kurtz's Aunt Edna's house for his cousin's Birthday Extravaganza. I like Cousin Pyro Pete. Pyro is a good egg, and he and I have always gotten along well. It might be because we are the most talkative people in the family. The Kurtz clan? Kind, contemplative, and speak deliberately with meaning. The Cousin Pyro Pete Clan? They're usually fussing over stuff in the kitchen, chirping and peeping like a bunch of baby chicks. Cousin Debbie got a new mountain bike? It's white noise. Their voices don't carry. Pyro and I? Well... we are definitely the ones who keep the party going. I was relieved to find that someone in that damn family has a sense of humor without me trying to dredge it out of them. It's tough to be the lone comic relief. A girl has got to have back up. I've crafted my husband from a sweet boy to a honery bastard. He's a lot funnier than he used to be, and I have my talents to thank for it. I just called to say I'm awesome. Anyways... Pyro and I usually dominate the family partays. I'm not loud, I'm just spirited. We don't see Pyro and his lovely wife Red too often, and it always makes family gatherings a lot better when they're in attendance. Pyro and Red recently moved to a new place where they cannot have animals, so their cat Lilly was at Aunt Edna's house. Lilly is a pretty little silver tabby with a sweet disposition, who is about a third of Mojo's enormous size. My cat's not fat... he's just got a thyroid problem! (Keep tellin' your self that, Kid). My Hermit Brother In Law brought some fresh catnip for Lilly, just to be a bastard. He's good at it, really. Mojo is a fiend for fresh catnip. The little bugger turns into Kate Moss with a mirror and a hundred Euro bill (not a hundred dollar bill... she is a super model. She understands the economic pitfalls of inflation) whenever he gets a leaf of it. The dried stuff is nothing compared to the fresh stuff, but I suppose some of us appreciate that more than others... Sigh.... Hermit-Bro gave the little kitty some of the catnip, and she definitely had a reaction. Instead of becoming a crazed crack maniac like my cat, she became slow, languid and rather contemplative. She found my Moms-In-Laws handbag, and started sniffing it, and rubbing on it like crazy. "She must smell something she's not familiar with" Pyro said. "I think it smells like Poodie." I answered... not even thinking about the fact that they probably have no idea that Kurtz nicknamed my mother in law's poodle... Poodie. Red's stunned expression, and Pyro's confusion pretty much summed it up. Yep. "The Poodle. Kurtz calls her Poodie... with a D. Poodie the Stupid Poodle." Everyone breathed a long sigh of relief. Everyone, including my mother in law, hates that damn dog. It was another inherit-an-animal. Kurtz started call her Poodie, since it amused him to no end. Hermit-Bro calls her Precious, in a mockingly creepy half-Gollum, half Silence of the Lambs sort of way. It's funny, but not as funny as Poodie. Of course I had to tell them that when the dog is playful, and wants to be chased, I always tell her that she better watch out for the Poodie Snatchers. "Poodie... The Poodie Snatchers are going to get you!"... She'll run around, get all crazy, and wear her fuzzy little butt out over that one. Besides, it's awfully fun to say. Of course this leads to "Invasion of the Poodie Snatchers", and so on. So that was our Saturday. We had a pretty decent time with the Cousins, and I had the shrinking suspicion that Mojo thought we raided his catnip stash. He depends on Hermit-Bro for his fix. Hermit-Bro is a cat drug dealer. He's been a cranky little fucker since then. Mojo Nixon... I think you need an intervention, Little Buddy. { Last Page } { Page 15 of 409 } { Next Page } |
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